Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Boys chasing girls

If only you were a male-identified Wobbly, you could write admiringly about women in these pages, too!

Where else do men have the opportunity to speak honestly about their relationships with women; and, moreover, to do so in revolutionary terms?

Consider my topic for today: Older men chasing younger women.

You see, the older man knows very well one way to relate to women, but has never taken the time to develop others. If he is retired and meets a college student, he wants to relate to her as when he was a college student. While his body has advanced with time, the rest remains stationary.

Our friend the older man has accepted certain social norms without ever asking himself if he deserves more.

Whatever his money, the richest man will have more than one thing to give another person, and more roles to play than the expected. The patriarchal ideal is bankrupt to him: the perennial skirt-chaser is cliché for a reason.

Any of us can end up like this older man if we don't build on our relations with women right now. We already know how to be one way; the way that is endorsed by power -- to take women seriously insofar as the social benefits accrue to us, as with status through sex. Within an organization, this is sometimes seen in the pairing of individuals romantically until the relationship ends -- and with it a woman's connection to both. How many women do we know who are no longer active in our work because they broke up with a boyfriend? We should be talking to them.

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